Friday, January 1, 2010

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Wow... 2010... Can you believe it?! It seems like it wasn't long ago that the world was in panic over Y2K; that "yesterday" was 10 years ago. Like most years (especially as I get older!), 2009 seemed to fly by. But there were also times throughout the year that seemed to last an eternity. I think that's how it is with any type of change... and 2009 was definitely a year of changes for me!

There really is nothing like the beginning of a new year! The ball has just dropped in Times Square, and as silly as it may sound, every year when I see that site I have tears in my eyes. I guess it's just the excitement of new beginnings that makes me so emotional. But you know what? With God, we can have that same overwhelming feeling every single day of our lives because He is the Author of new beginnings!

At this time of year, many people are anxiously setting new year's resolutions, and that is great for those who choose to do that (especially those who actually have the discipline to stick to those resolutions throughout the entire year - which is usually not me, by the way!). While resolutions are good, I believe our focus really should be on making life changes, not just resolutions (there's that dreaded word again... change!). As followers of Jesus, we must continually become changed individuals; we cannot staty the same, either in thoughts or in actions, and expect to enjoy the privilege of being used by God. We'll never do the same thing and move on with God - We have to be willing to go with God to the next place (even when - or I should say, especially when - we don't know where the next place is or what the next place holds!).

Before we look to the future of what 2010 holds, I think it's important to take some time to reflect on 2009 and the lessons we learned along the way. I could probably write an entire book on the lessons and happenings of this year alone. The Lord has called me to make many, many changes in my life (and, thankfully, I FINALLY quit fighting Him and answered His call!). I am so grateful that God is persistent and doesn't give up on me! I really don't know why we (or at least I) argue with God. First of all, He always wins eventually (and what do we miss in the time we waste in disobedience to Him?). Second, His plans are always so much better than any plans we could even imagine. With that said... I don't know why I do it, but I'm afraid I still do it all too often; but I am getting better at answering in obedience much more quickly.

Probably the biggest change for me this year was deciding to give up my office and my business in order to stay home with my son full time. Again, this was a very big challenge for me, to say the least! I knew this was the path God wanted me to take for at least six months prior. But I didn't know why He wanted me to make that change, and I didn't know what He wanted me to do instead, so I wasted a lot of time and energy arguing with Him (and/or trying to tune Him out!). I discovered a lot of things through the process of making that change: 1) It is only after I took that first step in faith that God then showed me the next step I was to take. It wasn't' long after I decided to make that change that God made it clear to me that I was to enter into a Ministerial Study Program. 2) Just because God calls you to do something, doesn't mean that you aren't going to have any challenges or that the journey is going to be easy. I went through some very tough, heart-breaking times throughout that process. But in retrospect, I realize that if it weren't for those challenges, I probably wouldn't have made the changes I did (at least not in the time and at the level that I did). 3) It is possible to be in total chaos, and still have peace in the Lord. There were many times that I felt I had some sort of "spiritual schizophrenia"! On one hand, I was totally confused, lost, frustrated, etc.; on the other, it was exciting to be experiencing the presence and peace of God in such a real, personal way. 4) I expereinced first hand the wonderful gift of people that God puts in our life. There were so many people, both long-time friends and some new acquaintenances. Those who know me know that asking others for help - or even accepting help when it's offered - is not my strong point (the word obstinent has been used to describe me far too many times! But for the first time, I began to really understand the importance of allowing the circle to be completed. I have always loved being the one others turn to for help, but I was not allowing them to be that person for me. During these times of change, God made it very clear that I could not do it on my own; not only did I need to trust Him and rely on Him, but I also had to receive the gift of friendship and wisdom from others. 5) I re-discovered what an amazing blessing it is to be able to be a stay-at-home mom! It's in those day-to-day "little" moments with my children that the real gifts of God are experienced.

So... I wanted to highlight just a few of the many, many (did I say many?!) lessons that I learned (or at least began to learn!) over the past year (in no particular order):

- Knowing about God is fascinating; knowing God personally is life changing. I never understood when people would say that "God told them..." or that they were following the path that God had set for them; I believed them, but I just didn't "get it". I found out that it is not only possible to hear the "voice" of God and to receive His direction, but God truly wants us to hear His voice, and He wants to convey His plans to us (in His perfect timing, of course). I also learned that there is no way to tell anyone else what that personal relationship with God is like. There are times that my heart breaks when I see people who are believers, but who are missing out on so much by not listening to that still small voice in their heart.

- "What is God's will for my life?" is not the right question; the right question is "What is God's will?" Once you know God's will, you can adjust your life to Him. The focus needs to be on God, not on your life! Look around each day and see where God is working, and ask Him for the courage to step out in faith when He calls me to action. I was driving myself completely crazy trying to figure out what God's will for my life was. I knew God was calling me to something, but I had no clue what it was (and I had no clue how to figure it out). Thankfully, God gave me the courage to reach out to my pastor, who told me to quit trying to figure out God's will. He told me to look around at what God is doing around me, and then see how He wants to use me in that situation. As part of my prayers each morning, I began asking God to show me where He was working around me today, and give me the courage to step out in faith when He calls me to act. It's amazing how you can see God working in people's lives every single day if you just seek to see through His eyes! By the way, my pastor suggested that I read the book, "Experiencing God" by Blackaby, and I very highly recommend it to anyone who wants to grow deeper in their personal relationship with Christ. It is one of those love-hate kind of books - it is great and will truly change your life, but if you're like me, it will also kick you in the gut quite a few times!

- The importance of surrender! We live in a do-it-yourself, pull yourself up by your boot straps kind of world. But it is in surrendering our will for the will of God that we begin to experience the presence of God in our life, and that we are best able to make a difference in the lives of others. The moment God speaks to you is the moment God wants you to respond to Him. Change is seldom easy, especially when you have been pursuing a dream and been on a specific path for quite awhile. Making a change in obedience to God does not always mean that you are going to be happy about doing so, but you can still have peace in knowing that you are doing as God willed. When I decided to give up my office and my business, I was definitely not happy about it, and my heart was broken for so many reasons. I had heard that when God gives you a new dream, that He will take away the desire that you have for your old dream (I had heard that, but I didn't know how that would ever be possible - I truly loved what I was doing, and fully expected to be doing that for the rest of my life!). But as the days went by, I found myself losing my desire for my old dreams, and becoming more and more passionate about the new dreams that God had given me. And by the way, even if the dreams you have in your heart are from God, you still need to surrender them to Him; God wants you to cling to Him, not to your dreams. He wants you to trust Him to fulfill your dreams, instead of you trying to make them happen in your own strength.

- There were a few songs that spoke very deeply to me, and that helped me keep God at the center of my life:

· "Here I Am" by Downhere - "Here I am, Lord send me. All of my life, I make an offering, Here I am, Lord send me. Somehow my store is part of Your plan, Here I am."

· "Whatever You're Doing" by Sanctus Real - "There's a wave that's crashing over me, and all I can do is surrender. Whatever You're doing inside of me, it feels like chaos, but somehow there's peace. And it's hard to surrender to what I can't see, but I'm giving in to something heavenly."

· " Revelation" by Third Day - "Give me revelation, show me what to do. Cause I've been trying to find my way, I haven't got a clue. Tell me should I stay here, or do I need to move. Give me a revelation. I've got nothing without You. I've got nothing without You."

· "By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North" - "Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall. In the dead of night whenever you call. Please don't fight these hands that are holding you. My hands are holding You."

· "The Motions" by Matthew West - "I don't wanna go through the motions, I don't wanna go one more day, without Your all consuming passion inside of me. I don't wanna spend my whole life asking what if I had given everything? Instead of going through the motions."

- Psalm 47:10 - "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." It is so important to take time every day to quite myself in order to hear God and come to know Him better. It's easy for me to justify that I'm talking to God all through my day (which I am, and that's important to do as well). But it is in those quite moments that God is able to speak to me as well. Yes, God will speak to me and give me direction throughout each day, but if I am in constant busyness, I will probably not be listening for His voice or looking to see where He is working around me.

- When you walk closely with God and live in obedience to His ways, you can trust that you are in the center of His will, no matter what the circumstances are around you. There are many people who believe that if you are doing as God commands and living in His will that you will never have any challenges; and that if you are facing struggles, then you must not be doing the right thing. I learned that more times than not, the opposite is true... when you are living in obedience and seeking to serve the Lord and others, you are sure to face challenges along the way. These are the times that we tend to lean on Him the most, the evil one is going to try and dissuade us from following God, and these are the times that others can often see Jesus through how we live our lives. The minute we take one step of obedience, God opens up new opportunities and shows us new areas that He is working. Don't determine your response to God by looking at your gifts; look at the Lord and say, "Yes, Lord! I know Your Spirit is present to enable me as I obey You. Thank You, Lord!" Obedience starts with having a heart that says "yes" to God.

- Once you decide to trust the Lord and obey, He will trust you with the power to do the work Once you decide to obey Him, you will know His presence like never before. It is up to us to take that first step in faith. We cannot worry that we are not capable of doing what God calls us to do. God does not look for our ability (praise God!); He looks for our availability. The purposes of God are not based on our ability, but on His ability to work through us. When God chooses you to do something, remember, this is His first choice, not His second best. God takes the ordinary, and fills them with the extraordinary. God wants to use you... not because no one else is available, but so His glory will be seen through you.

- God's love cannot be explained - it can only be experienced. While we are commanded to share the love of Jesus and the message of the Gospel with others, there is no way to tell them what it is like to have a personal relationship with Jesus, or how it feels to know that God loves us unconditionally in spite of our many shortcomings. We can share with others that God loves us so much that He gave His only Son as a sacrifice for us, and that Jesus paid the price for our sins through a brutal death. But we cannot convey to them how that love fills our hearts and enables us to love others unconditionally as well. They must come to know Jesus as their personal Savior. The great news is that Jesus wants to have a relationship with them; all they need to do is ask Him and receive His gift!

- God is the same yesterday, today, and forever! We live in a world of pain and suffering, challenges and tragedies. The effects of sin are seen all around us every day. But no matter what is happening around us or in our own lives, God never changes; He is the one thing in this world that we can always count on. He is the same after the unexpected death of a loved one as He was before; He is the same after receiving the news of a life-threatening disease as He was before; He is the same after that mass shooting as He was before; He is the same after that job loss as He was before. We can always be sure that He will never leave us, that He is in complete control, and that He can take any situation and use it for good.

- Service is the pathway to real significance. It is through ministry that we discover the meaning of our lives. I was so blessed this year to be able to meet many great people and begin many special friendships, just because I was willing to serve others in some way. Whether it was through an outreach opportunity through our church, an acquaintance met through a business environment, or simply in meeting someone new and reaching out to help in some way... if I went into each adventure in prayer and asking God to show me what to say and/or do, He almost always gave me an opportunity to take that extra step to reach out to someone. In many of those cases, those I was reaching out to felt as though I was helping them; truth be told, I was the one that was receiving an amazing gift!

- Prayer, Prayer, Prayer! The power of prayer! The vehicle to getting to know Jesus more intimately, the gift of being able to intercede on behalf of others, the comfort of the presence of God... EVERYTHING revolves around prayer and Scripture. Pray continually!

So... just a few "notes" of the past year (I said I could probably write a book, and I think I came pretty close to doing just that!). Believe it or not, I've probably left out some very key lessons and many wonderful words that God had put before me this year; thankfully, the learning never has to end, for God is a God of new beginnings, and He is constantly molding us into the person He made us to be.

I pray that you will take some time to reflect on all that God did in your life this past year; I pray that you will always seek to experience the love of God and the presence of Jesus in your life; I pray that you will ask God to show you where He is working around you each day, that He will give you the courage to step out in faith as He leads, and that you will respond in obedience to what He asks; and I pray that 2010 will be a year of changed lives for you - that your life will be changed as you respond to the Lord, and that you will help to change others' lives by allowing Jesus to work through you, and willingly and eagerly being the hands and feet of Jesus.

With Love and Prayers,

Kim